Summer Fun 7-9-07

We had a wonderful weekend. My brother flew in from California to surprise my mom...he definitely succeeded in doing so, as she literally almost passed out. Saturday evening we took my grandparents to an English pub (my grandma is British) in this adorable little resort town nearby. It was so nice to have dinner with my parents, brother and grandparents. Afterwards we went in a few shops and then got ice cream and ate it while we sat by the water and watched the boats. It was the most gorgeous weather ever...making it a perfect evening.

Last night my brother surprised my mom again by taking her and my dad and me and my sister on a dinner cruise. It was the first time we had all been together just the parents and kids (minus my two sisters in Florida :( ) in forever. Jonathan stayed home becuase I didn't want Landon on this trip...an evening out on a boat sounded like something I needed to do without my three year old for once. It was another GORGEOUS evening and we had the best time just talking and hanging out as a family. I wish it could have lasted longer... After the boat right we went to a local coffee shop and then headed to my house so Landon could play with Jason and my mom for a few mintues before he went to bed. It was such a wonderful evening!

I am trying to get a resume together for a teaching position at a local community college. It would be so helpful to us if I could get a class or two to teach this fall...and I would REALLY enjoy it. Anyway, I hate writing resumes. I just don't look good on paper...at all really. Maybe it is the fact that I have not had a real job in three years, or maybe it is that the jobs I had before that were pretty lowly, considering I got pregnant with Landon a few months before we graduated from college (for any of you wondering...we were married BEFORE our senior year of college). Whatever it is, I feel inadequate and I hate it. I absolutely know that we should not base our worth or self-concept on things like this, but when you are trying to get someone to give you an interview and you have nothing much to work with, it can be discouraging. I had good grades in college and so far in grad school, but you can only go so far with that... 

Noah is doing so well. He has been sleeping from about 10pm until 4:30 for almost a week now. Two nights ago he went until 6:15 before waking up. The only real problem is that he wants to wake up for the day around 7...and that is not when I want to wake up...namely becuase I haven't been able to get to bed before midnight. He was stuck at 2:30 for the longest time and one night early last week I decided that I was going to let him cry it out...that cured it. He hasn't woken at that time since. Tomorrow is his two month check-up. I don't even know how that is possible. July 10th seemed so far away for so long, and now here it is. Poor kid is going to get shots. I am dreading it, but he is a trooper and I am sure he will be just fine. I am eager to see what he weighs...he is a chunk!  His little fingers are starting to get chubby. I love chubby baby fingers.

Last night Jonathan was driving Landon and Landon piped up from the back of the car, "Dad, what are those numbers?" Jonathan asked him what numbers he was talking about and Landon said, "The numbers on that white sign." Apparently, he noticed the speed limit sign...and knows what numbers look like. Landon proceeded to say, "Actually, there are two numbers on the white sign." Jon said yeah...45. Apparently Landon knows the difference between letters and numbers...and how exactly did he learn this???

I have so many thoughts swimming around in my head. Deep thoughts about random things that I just can't formulate, so I guess I will leave this post at the surface level...and a bit discombobulated. Oh well. Off to enjoy the day...and my kiddos.

Oh yeah...I forgot. I messaged a few of you who expressed interest in the xanga get together and the only replies I got back were from those of you who can't do it (thank you by the way!). I haven't heard from any yeses at this point, so unless someone is in dire need of it or totally planning on it, I think we will put it on hold...maybe next year? But...if anyone just wants to come visit for a weekend or something...I am totally up for that. We have great beaches 

A Smattering of our Week 7-4-07

A Smattering Of Our Week

This week has been wonderfully busy! Here are a few pictures to give you a visual of what has kept us so busy! Last weekend we took Landon to see Ratatoulle. I ended up burping Noah in the hallways for most of it, but it wa a cute movie..and Landon really enjoyed the experience. Good thing, becuase I don't think we will be doing that again for a few years (until Noah is old enough to sit through it). Early in the week I took Landon to a nearby park where they were having a petting farm exhibit. He got to get in the pens and hold the baby rabbits and chickens...he loved it! Afterwards I took him to a bagel shop and we snacked on a bagel and then finished the morning with a trip to the park where a scary man wouldn't leave me alone. Thankfully, we were able to leave before we were left alone with the man...but we escaped with only seconds to spare. It was a great morning otherwise 

Our fourth of July was spent just the four of us. We took Landon for pizza and then took him to a local mini-golf course. It was the first time he ever did it, and he loved it. Nevermind that he kept picking up the ball and putting it 2 inches from the hole and then exclaiming his victory when he would knock it in. Too fun! He loved it and it was such a gorgeous evening that I enjoyed strolling around the course and watching. Afterwards, we got ice cream...yumm! and then came home to light sparklers and two fountains that I bought for Landon. He L-O-V-E-D it! He ran all around the yard with the sparklers (and I ran a few times with him) pretending to be a bird and a plane and singing Happy Birthday America. Afterwards, we lit the fountains and Landon screamed in delight...literally. He was so much fun to watch. It was a wonderful evening spent just as a family.

Before I forget...as much as I have tried to keep Noah small...he isn't. In fact, at 7 weeks of age the kid is consistently rolling from tummy to back. But he is a riot...he is really starting to enjoy his play mat and is even starting to bat at the little animals hanging down from it. He is such a happy baby and brings so much joy to our home!

Finally, the other day I was rocking Noah, and Landon meandered into the room. He proceeded to climb onto the other side of my lap (good thing it is a big lap!) and said as he did so, "Mommy takes care of everybody!" Melt my heart. 

We are off to my mom's today and then my grandma's tomorrow. Busy, fun times.  Oh yeah...and you can't tell in this picture of me, but I have one you can...my hair is turning red again on top...just like it did when Landon was about 7 week old. Its going straight too. I hate it. The top is straight and red and the bottom is blonde and curly. I don't even know what to do with it...guess I will just cut it all off and start over 

EDIT: I just got to my mom's and I just have to say that I love coming home. No one is here yet, but there are chocolate chip cookies on the counter and all of the windows are open...even the birds sound familiar. I just love home.

A Few Thoughts

This is going to sound somewhat like I am tooting my own horn...or reveling in my own praise...but a realization hit me last night as I was laying in the bath tub for all of five minutes. Motherhood has got to be one of the most selfless jobs in the entire world. I spent the entire day, like I do nearly every day lately, hopping from child to child taking care of what they needed. Evenings are especially like this. I make dinner, clean up, play with Landon for a bit and then bathe him, bathe Noah, get Landon a snack, read Landon a story, say prayers, rush to feed Noah, clean up the house, pump a bottle, and fall into bed around 11:30 with aching legs and an exhausted body. Some days I really feel like a ping pong ball jumping from child to child (and I only have two!!!). Last night I had a fever and my body ached so badly so I decided that I WAS going to take a bath and try to get the aches to ease up, at least a bit. Noah was fussy, as he often is from about 9 to 10:30pm, but I tried not to think about it. However, as I lay in the bath I found myself feeling guilty that I wasn't helping with him...for the whole ten minutes it took me to sit in there. It was at that moment that I realized, especially since Noah's arrival, that I never take time for myself anymore. I am constantly rushing. Rushing from store to store to avoid a breakdown, rushing to get things done between feedings, rushing to get dressed because every single day Noah starts crying as soon as I get in the shower, even rushing to get to bed because I know that at 2:30 a little person will need his pacifier inserted into his mouth about twenty times until he finally goes back to sleep until 4am when I will need to feed him. I am not complaining at all. I don't mind not having time for myself because I know that it will change as Noah gets older, and as Landon matures as well. But all of this just got me thinking that motherhood seriously demands a denial of self, which then got me thinking about the Lord as my Father and how often I am the reluctant child, the resistant child, the demanding child, the whiny child, etc.. The difference being that He never loses His patience with me, ever.

I really do feel like I am starting to fall into a pattern in our new life and I like it. It is definitely busier, and I am constantly moving and have little time for myself (clearly some time because I am on xanga...although I am rushing bc I am on borrowed time with Noah), but I wouldn't go back for anything. I had my 6 week check up on Tuesday and I had a really great conversation with my OB. She has three young children and I was talking to her about how she balanced them and her job and where she found her fulfillment (earthly fulfillment...not spiritual  ). She mentioned time and again that at the end of the day, all that really matters is your family. She is right. I love it that at 6 weeks of age my son looks all around a room for me, finds me with his bright eyes and gets a huge grin on his lips. I love it that he wants to snuggle up to me because I am familiar and because he knows that I will meet his needs. I love it that Landon knows how much I love him and has certain things he wants only me to do. I love it that my children know me and want me and need me...and I them. What satisfaction it must bring the Lord to say about us, His children, that He loves it when we know Him, want Him, and need Him. Relationship is what He desires, so what satisfaction it must bring Him to say that of His children.

My time on here is up and it is time to face another day. My children bring me so much joy and such a sense of fulfillment. The every day tasks of feeding, clothing, doing laundry, and cleaning toilets can get so mundane and seem so pointless at times, but when you look at the big picture it is those things that bring the most security to our families. We take care of their daily needs, and while the work may be taken for granted, and constantly need doing, ultimately, it is providing stability and maintaining a sense of homeostasis in the home that is the foundation for almost everything else.There may be no praise, and little gratitude for the mundane tasks, which brings me back to my original point that motherhood demands selfless sacrifice, but it also provides an opportunity for personal growth and learning to love on a new level, a much more fulfilling level. Motherhood is a perfect opportunity to learn to love as God intended it...selflessly.

A Million Smiles

A Million Smiles

Noah has been so smiley lately. He is much more smiley than Landon ever was. Landon was a more content baby then Noah, but it was very difficult to get him to smile. Noah smiles all of the time...in fact if Landon just starts laughing, Noah breaks into a big toothless grin as though he totally gets exactly what is so funny. I would pay a lot of money to get to see his grins...but I don't have to. I paid my dues by enduring nine months of nausea and now I have this happy, interactive, beautiful boy. Man am I blessed.

I think I am getting this two kids thing. I feel as though daily living is not so difficult anymore. In fact, it is quickly returning to normal. Noah is beginning to fall into a pattern and I know him better so I can more adequately address his needs. Now if only we could be healthy...

Sickness has hit the household again. This is completely unbelievable to me...in fact, it is becoming comical. Well, aside from the fact that this time it is my 6 week old infant and not my healthy-and-able-to-fight-it three year old. Wednesday of last week Noah started acting funny...he would NOT wake up and wasn't eating well. He seemed ok Thursday, but coughed a few times...same thing Friday and Saturday and then Saturday evening and Sunday he took a turn for the worse. He is really congested and his cough sounds like a noise I cannot describe (certainly one that should not be coming from such a little human) and the poor guy is just miserable. But he is still eating and does not have a fever, so unless one of those things happen we are just waiting for him to get better. Well, ok, so I scheduled a doctor appointment for later this afternoon...just to be safe. I feel so sad for him, and yet..many times throughout this sickness the little guy has just been smiling through the pain. In these short 6 weeks this baby boy has absolutely stolen my heart. I cannot imagine my life without him.

Friday night we went to buy Landon's cement mixer that he had saved up for. Uh Oh...the store didn't have it, but we found a garbage truck instead. He was ecstatic and I think he loves it way more than he would have the mixer. In fact, he has been playing with it every single spare second since we got it. He has a tub of lego's and he uses those for his trash and drives the truck all around the house picking up his piles of "trash". Yesterday Jonathan said something emphatically to Landon like, "Put it down slowly, Landon!" and Landon replied quickly back..."Call me trash man not Landon!!!" Wonderful...he really thinks he is a trash man .

Saturday we travelled for a birthday party for our nephew. It was a wonderful day with family. Tonight is small group. I didn't go to church yesterday in an effort to keep the boys from getting any other sicknesses. I feel overcome with sickness....and I really think if one more member of this house gets ANYTHING I will indeed lose my mind.

Our deck is still 80% done...has been for weeks. We did get some landscaping planted...it looks so much better. It is amazing what a few plants, strategically placed, can do for a yard! This week we have a doctor appointment for me tomorrow (it is my 6 week check and at this point I will have both boys with me...oh joy!)  and hopefully a trip down to my mom's on Thursday to see my grandparents. Weeks seem to be passing like days...seriously, it is out of control!

Pleae pray for us...we desperately need some health back into this house.

Family Times

This week has been an absolute blur of activity! Wednesday my mom came and stayed with the boys while I went to get groceries. It was wonderful. I had an hour and a half to myself...granted, I was rush, rush, rushing to get the library books back to the library, get strawberries from the farmers market and get a full list of grocery shopping done...but it all got accomplished and I got to listen to MY music in the car. Wonderful. While I was gone, not only did she watch my children but she somehow managed to get both bathrooms cleaned, all of the carpet vacuumed (tiny little lady even moved my couch!), my kitchen floor swept, and the string in my skirt pulled through the hole (don't you hate it when you have a draw string that gets lost in the dryer). Amazing. Who besides a mom would do all of that for you...and so quickly that my mind is still spinning as to how she ever got it all done. When I got home she took Landon to the play ground for an hour and I fed Noah and mopped my floor...and viola...a perfectly clean house.

That night we had Jon's sister and her little girl over to spend the night. Landon loved playing with Isabelle and the two ran around the house until way too late. Thursday the whole crew came...all three sisters and kids and mom. We went to get brunch and then made our way to the beach. The kids loved playing together and although it was a bit windy and cool, the kids didn't seem to mind. Noah slept the entire time in the stroller. Beautiful.

Then we all came back to my house, took showers, cleaned up and went out to dinner to celebrate Jon's sister's birthday. By this time the kids  were about to have it...no naps and a busy, busy day at the beach...very  tired children. But it was mostly enjoyable. Finally, we all came back to the house for cake and coffee and at 9 we had an empty house. It was so fun to be together and hang out. Now I need my mom to come back 

This weekend we are gone...again for our nephew's birthday party. I just cannot find time to breathe anymore! No wonder time is flying so fast...we are so busy! But busy is good and fun.

Landon is doing better but still not totally healthy. I think I have pink eye. But the sun is shining and the windows are open and it is a gorgeous day...so no complaining here. Oh yeah...and I forgot to mention that Landon has saved enough for his cement mixer so tonight we are off to make his first real purchase. He is pretty excited, and I am glad to get this wad of dollar bills off my counter 

A Smile Like mine 6-19-07

A Smile Like Mine

I can't get over this picture. Yesterday afternoon, Noah was on my bed and Landon was talking to him and touching his head (Landon always wants to "pet" brother) and Noah just broke out in an all-out grin at his big brother....and it wasn't just one big grin, it was as though he kept smiling at him over and over. It was the first time Noah reacted to Landon, and my heart melted into a puddle as my two boys played together for the first time!

In other news, Landon's imagination has EXPLODED. Every day he imagines something new that just amazes me. Yesterday he "built" a bird house out of a breakfast tray, a candle holder and some pillows. He used his little wooden hammer to build it and then asked me for some pennies, which he used for bird food. It may not sound all that interesting, but I don't even know where he learned about bird houses and to see him imagining and really thinking that he built a bird house was like a blast from the past. I remember imagining and playing...house, school, my little ponies, etc...I also remember the day that I noticed that it first got difficult to imagine. At a certain age, playing became not so natural, and adulthood loomed shortly thereafter. I love to watch Landon get lost in make-believe.

Landon is also absolutely obsessed with garbage trucks. In fact, when he had his chest x-ray the other night he was telling Jonathan and the tech all about his plan to be a garbage truck driver when he grew up...all the way down to the color of his truck (yellow). Both the tech and Jonathan were laughing and Jon told him that after he graduated from college, if he still wanted to be a garbage truck driver, he could .  When we are driving down the road now, at every house Landon reaches out as though he is a side-loader (yes I know that term bc we have been watching garbage truck movies from the library) and pretends to grab the trash and then "dumps" the trash into his truck by raising his arm up and hitting his head. He looks ridiculous, but again, he really thinks he is a trash truck and it is so much fun to watch.

Yesterday didn't seem too productive, but instead of taking a nap I finished all of my thank-you's and finally got caught up on my emails. Landon did not have any coughing spells during his nap so I was able to get both of those finished up, and although it was a small feat, it really feels good to have those two things done. Wednesday night  my sister-in-law and my niece are spending the night and then on Thursday Jon's mom and all three of Jon's sisters and their kids are all coming over and we are spending the day at the beach. It is supposed to be a beautiful day and it should be a great time. Other than that, I have no specific plans this week...the deck remains 80% finished, we have landscaping to plant, weeds to pull, a house to clean, you know...the usual.

Noah has been only getting up once a night for about a week...usually around 4 and then around 7 (but I don't count 7 bc that is morning). I have really appreciated the reprieve, but last night he was up around 2 and I held him off until 2:40 but then he was screaming, so I fed him. Instead of going right back to sleep like he has been, he was fussy and awake until 4. I realized that before he was only waking once a night I would not have minded so much becuase I had no expectations, but since I knew he could put himself back to sleep I was more frustrated becuase in one week I had develeped expectations. Not to say we should not expect things from our children (we absolutely should!...just maybe not from a 5 week old)...but I think I need to work on my expectations for night-waking. I stressed so much about it with Landon, and I just don't want to do that this time. But I love my sleep, and everyone who knows me well knows that I can be a grumpy bear if I am tired. I don't want my kids reaping the negative consequences of my grouchiness. Just because some 5 week old babies sleep through the night, doesn't mean mine will.

This picture is from Noah's first bath in his infant bath tub. I gave him sponge baths until his cord fell off and since then I have been doing it in the sink, but last night I figured he was big enough for this baby tub. He LOVED it. Our wonderful friends in Colorado (courtatwell) Jason and Courtenay surprised us with this gift a few months ago. They use this tub with their kids and she knew I needed a good tub this time around so she ordered it for me and one day it spontaneously showed up on my doorstep. Gotta love unexpected blessings! And Noah just loved it...and so did Landon becuase he got to help wash Noah.

Coming soon (as soon as I figure out our scanner) a picture of Noah and a baby picture of me...I didn't realize how much we looked alike until last night. It is so different to have a child look like me...Landon is so daddy, but Noah is quite Mama's boy.

Adventures in Pnemonia Landon 6-07

Adventures in Pnemonia Land Perhaps my transition into parenthood of two young children would have been smooth, if Landon had not been sick since Noah was one week old. It started with a small cold four weeks ago. A week later, that suddenly escalated into a really bad upper respiratory infection for which we got a steroid. That was better for all of one day when suddenly he developed a fever and by Friday was throwing up and coughing constantly. Yet another trip to urgent care won us a pnemonia diagnosis (who gets this in June?) and an antibiotic. Friday night Landon was basically delirious. He kept crying all night that he could not see and his teeth hurt and he had to get out of the house and it wasn't fair...and on and on it went making no sense whatsoever. Saturday dawned a new day which saw much improvement in Landon, but we were all so tired...I having slept only three hours the night before (considering I was up with Landon most of the night and Noah the rest). I am so relieved that the worst is behind us. Besides Landon's lungs sounding like he is drowning every time he coughs, he is so much better. The fever is gone and although we are still battling coughing fits...he is getting better. Noah is still in the clear...Praise the Lord. Noah getting sick is the absolute last thing in the world I need right now. I was pretty down last week. I think the sleep deprivation and the constant sickness with Landon is just getting to me. I don't feel like I can adequately enjoy Noah becuase I am constantly focusing on Landon (who is SO needy when he is sick). I feel like time is passing so quickly and the summer is already flying by. But oh well...maybe it will all get better now. Definitely hoping in that direction. Judging from the responses I got about the Xanga get together, I was curious to see if the first weekend in August (3-5) would work better for you all. Can you please comment me and let me know if you want to come and if that weekend would work better or worse, or at all for you? I really want to get this thing nailed down so we can start planning. I can't wait to meet/see you all!!! Noah is getting huge. He feels so heavy to me and I am noticing that the onesies that were so big on him when he was first born are starting to get tight. I put him in the outfit he wore home from the hospital the other day and was amazed at how much he had grown. The outfit was HUGE on him a month ago...now he fills it out almost completely. Babies grow so fast! About a week ago we put him on Zantac and that has really helped with his feeding issues. He is still a spitter, but not nearly as much and he doesn't seem to be in pain anymore, which is very reassuring! Oh yeah...and I forgot to blog about this weeks ago, but when he was two weeks old, he had a clogged tear duct that got infected. I read to put breastmilk in his eye becuase it has antibiotic properties. I thought I had nothing to lose, so I tried it, and you know...that eye was healed in twenty-four hours! Amazing stuff! Well, that is it for now. This week promises to be a busy one, and I am praying a healthy one. I could use a massage or a pedicure or a chat with a good friend over coffee or a night out alone or...well, I will just keep dreaming. I have so much to be thankful for. I know that. The other night our waitress at Bob Evans told us that she and her husband had been trying to have children for 12 years. They were told it would never happen. Then miraculously, she got pregnant and they are expecting their baby boy in September. She was so excited and glowing and just joyous. I can't imagine getting something you yearned for so long...the joy must be so huge. When I am catching puke or get only three hours of sleep a night, I need to remember these people who would long to have a sleepless night, if only it meant they could have their own children. I know we are blessed. I need to live that out when I feel it and when I don't. Life isn't about feelings anyway...the fact of the matter is that I am blessed beyond measure!