Changity Change Change Change
Every summer, I blog about the sound of the cicadas and how it personifies the switch from summer to fall for me. I love the fall...I really do, but I dread (read: HATE) the winter. But this summer the cicadas didn't make their normal noise at the normal time, perhaps because the summer was a good 10 degrees cooler than normal...so maybe they just got confused. I don't know. Or maybe I was so busy with life and living that I just didn't notice. But somehow...here we are on the verge of Labor Day, summer is days away from ending...and fall is fast upon us.
The day after Labor Day, Tuesday the 8th, is Landon's first day of school. Tonight was his orientation, we got to catch the bus and ride it along his normal route and then he met his teacher and we parents went to a meeting. When we were on the bus, one of the other moms leaned over and told me that she got teary as she watched her son climb aboard the bus. I wasn't feeling that at all. I was expecting to, but I felt rather numb...like I had been planning for this day for so long that I was just going about it in auto-pilot. Landon was so excited to catch the bus. I cannot even tell you. I continued on in auto pilot until during the parent meeting, they showed a video. It was a video of this older man who found his grown son's journal from when he was 6 years old. The man went and got his own "business journal" from that same year. He found the same dates. His said, "Wasted the whole day fishing with Jimmy. Didn't catch a thing." His son's entry said, "Went fishing with dad. Best day of my life." My eyes welled up with tears and try as I might to keep them in, as I went back down the hall to get Landon I had to literally bite back the tears. When I got home and Landon was outside playing with his best friend, I started to tell Jonathan about the video and I just lost it. Wasn't it just yesterday that I was playing Mozart to build his baby IQ? And wasn't it last week that he told me he loved me for the first time, and potty trained, and learned his letters and numbers, and helped me with the laundry, and was obsessed with the vacuum cleaner, and in love with Bob the Builder? And now I am sending him on a bus to a school for 8 hours where he has to be independent and make hot lunch choices. This year is going to bring big change in my son's life. And while he has taken MANY steps of independence...this one feels monumental. This one feels huge. As they reminded us today at the orientation...he is, after all, the class of 2022. Which seems like a long ways away, until you consider that it is nearly 2010 and he is nearly 6 years old, which is half of the remaining years until 2022. Did you catch all that?
My boy is growing up. And while I am so thankful that he is healthy enough to go to school...that he has life and breath to enjoy his first day of school, my heart already aches at the era that just passed us by. I look to the future with anticipation and excitment, but occasionally I miss the baby Landon that I used to cuddle, the toddler Landon I used to chase, and even the preschool Landon I used to play with and go everywhere with...every day of the week.
On Landon's first day of school, I also will be starting a new era in our lives. I start school that day too. Teaching, that is. I am excited...really I am. But I am scared to death as well. I have 41 students. Two sections. For my entire life I have been taught...and now I am going to teach. I have a few of my lectures and powerpoints prepared, my syllabus all ready to go, and ideas swirling around in my head. This is going to be an interesting experience...I don't doubt that one bit. So it will be Landon's first day, my first day and probably many of my student's first day of college (I am teaching a Psych gen ed). I see potential in all of this. Lots of it.
And since everything was changing all at once, I decided to try to potty train Noah at the same time. Probably not such a great idea. But the kid sure is cute in underwear. Don't ask me how it is going. You don't want to know.
Change is swirling through our household and so are some really important decisions. We could use some prayer for sure. And since I have been dying to do a happy, fun post for some time now, and just haven't had the time, I will pique your curiousity and let you know that come Sept 14, I will have a link to share with you that is going to absolutely bless your socks off. It is a love story like you rarely hear. It is a redemptive story that novels are made of. Except it involves real people and the God that pursues us with unrelenting love and unbelievable grace. The fact that I have had the absolutely privelege of being a small part of this story has left an indelible mark on my life. Just thinking about it makes my heart swell with renewed faith and hope and love. Stay tuned friends. You WON'T want to miss this.
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