I have been meaning to write, really I have. Tonight I am just going to steal the time. We have Christmas music playing right now and the sound of that is mixing with my sons' delighted squeals as they play outside in our first snowfall of the year. The snow started to fall this evening as I made my way home from work. I had to stop at the hospital to get some blood work done and even there, nurses and staff people were coming out of their offices just to gaze at the beautiful, falling snow. There is truly something mesmerizing about the first snow fall of the season, especially when it comes down in gigantic fluffy flakes against a dusky sky....absolutely gorgeous.
Life is trucking right along for us. We had a beautiful Thanksgiving and a wonderful weekend together as a family. We went and cut down our Christmas tree, and all four of us participated in decorating it this year. I think we found the perfect tree! At the farm, the boys found a stray kitty and begged for us to take it home. Alas, I said no...but can you see the longing on BOTH of their faces?! How much longer am I going to be able to hold out?
I have only two more weeks of my class and my first semester of teaching is also coming to a close. I am going to be sad to say goodbye to my students...they were my first students ever, and I won't forget them! This semester has been a learning experience, and a growing one at that, but I have thoroughly enjoyed it. My heart still belongs to the counseling world, but I have had some really neat experiences to get to know some of my students and to get a peak into their lives. They are some strong, tenacious people with courage and gumption. I have felt so blessed lately...in so many ways.
And even in that, we have had a few "disappointments" lately. Things we had thought would happen easily that aren't happening that way, stories we thought would end differently. It is amazing the power we have as humans in simple things, like choice...and how free will can set us free or bind us. It is amazing how bad choices can still be used for good (GRACE), and it is difficult to watch when bad choices bring consequences, especially to someone you care about greatly.
I am really enjoying this season of life. I love how children tend to make all things new and exciting. Noah is finally at the age that he can go outside with Landon and they can play together for hours. Simple things thrill him, like making foot prints in the snow and catching snowflakes on his mitten...and hot cocoa with marshmallows. And Landon just plain loves this season. He loves decorating the tree and doing the Advent calendar. He loves going to the Parade of Lights and wrapping presents for people he loves (he has already wrapped at least 10 presents). And his little heart is so sensitive. My little Landon was getting picked on a little bit at school by some bully-ish kids. I am not one to fight my children's battles, but it is not an easy thing to sit back and have your child ask you why certain kids are laughing at him. So we started to pray for Nathan's heart (the ring leader) and I encouraged Landon to meet this kid's behavior with love. At the same time I was teaching him boundaries ( I don't want him to be a door mat either!). The other night I heard Jonathan talking to Landon about this kid and how he doesn' t have to take his bullying and Landon cut him off and said, "It is ok Dad, Mom and I are praying for his heart to change and I know God is going to do it!" My eyes filled up with tears...that is childlike faith right there. Beautiful. My adult-faith BEGGED God to come through and show His power. My adult faith also is grounded in too much reality, and doubted the outcome a little. But me of little faith...
Last night when Landon came home from school he reported that he waved and smiled at Nathan (something he had tried before that didn't go over so well), and Nathan smiled and said hi to Landon (you have no idea how this small gesture was a HUGE improvement). Landon's face nearly beamed as he told me that God had changed Nathan's heart. Tonight when he was praying he thanked God for Nathan and for changing his heart and prayed that he has a good mommy and daddy and that he could be a good friend to him. I have no real idea if this kid will continue to be kind to Landon, but my son needed to see this and God came through in a big way. Landon's teacher wants him to be more assertive and to not just take it when kids pick on him. I agree to an extent, but if Landon's heart stays as sensitive and beautiful as it is tonight for the rest of his life, I will be one proud mama.
I am so grateful that we serve such a personal God. A Creator of the universe who cares enough about a blonde haired Kindergartner to make another kid smile and say hi. A God who shows His power in simple and beautiful ways. And I am thankful for childlike faith...I am inspired to have more of it in my own life.
I contrast how God showed his power for Landon and how others I know with real needs, are still in the waiting. And I am comforted by the fact that even in the waiting, God is there. That even if Nathan treats Landon poorly for the rest of the year, God is in his corner. That if the answers my friends and myself are looking for remain elusive for another year or a lifetime, that God is even in that. I guess what I am trying to say is that I am grateful that every day brings with it new opportunities to choose and to love and to grow. I am thankful that just as snow makes the dead of winter so beautiful, the grace of God clothes us with strength and newness and the courage to face tomorrow.
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